My journey starts with a single step towards healing from the experiences I have had in my life. It isn't always pretty, but it is honest, candid, and cathartic. By telling my story, I am breaking 10 years of silence. Each step is a step towards exorcising the demons of my past, discussing the present state of things and moving forward to a hope filled future.
Thank you for joining me.
With today, February 8, 2015, being the 5th anniversary of my dad's passing, I thought it was only appropriate to post my favorite picture with him...I'm the one with my fingers in my mouth and twirling my hair.
5 years is a long time. 1826 days (leap year counts!). 43,824 hours. 2,629,440 minutes (if I did my math right). With all that time, I would think that the pain from loss would have eased a little bit by now. I would think that I wouldn't be relieving and replaying every minute of each day that happened 5 years ago. I guess that would make life too easy.
Tuesday, February 3rd, will mark 5 years since I last heard my dad's voice. It will mark 5 years since he was able to say, "I love you and I am proud of you." It will mark 5 years since I heard him say "Happy birthday." I think about that day every single day. Every year I replay it all starting in mid-January. It is like a never ending tape. It makes it nearly impossible to be happy about my birthday because all I think about is how much I miss him and how I will never get to hear his voice say those things again.
I think about all of the happy times, all of the ways that my dad made every day l…